Letter to District 12: Week of 12/7
Friends,
Today is Delaware Day! On December 7th, 1787, Delaware earned its nickname as the “First State” when we became the first to ratify the Federal Constitution. This weekend is also special because Steve and I celebrated our 11th anniversary. I’d like to share more about our story.
Growing up different is not easy. You can feel misunderstood and isolated. I grew up without any gay role models, which made things much worse. The previous generation of gay men were decimated by the HIV epidemic – a preventable calamity borne from intentionally cruel public policy. Marriage was always out of the question. I figured I would always be alone.
The very first person I met in medical school was Steve. We hit it off quickly and spoke almost every day during that first summer. The best part of my day would be when he called. We were similar in so many ways – both high achievers, both wanting to make our parents proud, both wanting to bring some light into the world. For the first time in my life, I found my reflection in another person – someone who could understand. I fell in love quickly and completely.
The day Steven asked me to marry him was the best day of my life. He proposed by sending me on a scavenger hunt all through our favorite spots in Philadelphia. On April 14th, 2012, I found him at the last spot – the Franklin Institute – surrounded by all of our friends and family. He got on one knee, and he changed my life forever. He didn’t just love me, he proved to me that I was worthy of being loved. And because of him, I am not alone.
We went through three years of medical residency before we had time to actually get married. Hard to plan a wedding when you live in a hospital! And six months after that, in June 2015, we sat at our kitchen table celebrating as Obergefell v. Hodges was decided. This decision from SCOTUS found that the Fourteenth Amendment required states to license same-sex marriages, and recognize those unions formed in other states. Now all of our gay brothers and sisters across the country can share in the stabilizing and transformative union of marriage.
Steven and I are proud to have built our lives here in Delaware, taking care of our neighbors and strengthening our community. I couldn’t imagine being anywhere else. In 1787, our forefathers thought that quick ratification of the Constitution would protect Delaware from larger surrounding states. In their wisdom, they kept our vibrant culture intact and paved the way for families like mine to live peaceful and productive lives. Delaware has been very good to us, and I hope to serve Delawareans in kind.
Until next time,
Dr. Rob Bahnsen
Candidate for State Representative, District 12